finally am home for the weekend, and i havent been home for so long, everyone has been feeding me all kinds of stuff, until i feel so happy and fattttt.
my dad's voice felt so surreal over the phone yesterday when i called, and then i realised i havent talked to him for weeks, nearly a month. just saying the words papa and mummy made me feel suddenly like a little girl again, safe and protected.
like i could always depend on them.
and then i see mummy's newly (or maybe not, i wouldnt know, i havent seen her in so long) sprained ankle, and sombreness sets in. they look much older than i remember.
and papa just finds out his little girl has been exposed to naked! pple in drawing class. he expression is so comical, it feels a bit sad.
my sis is offering me her subway cookies and asking me to cut her hair for her. i feel like a adventurer from one of those animations, where i come back from a long ardous journey that no one understands, but still they enjoy the time when i return. haha. i feel important.
was supposed to write my lit essay, but i havent done anything productive the whole day, and it feels damn good. i havent had time to sit down with myself and talk to my shadow. so suffocated in school.
it seems to make perfect sense that the shadow becomes the manifestation of one's consciousness of self.
lovely imagery.
sometimes i need to get lost in my music playlist to remind myself of who i am. need to pep-talk myself and ask what exactly it is im after now.
what am i saying.
sentosa, anyone?
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